Death Wears Fuzzy Bunny Slippers

It turns out that while waiting for the literal end of the world, nuclear crews spend a lot of time waiting ……… and waiting ……… and waiting ……… and waiting ……… and waiting.

Two guys a hundred feet underground for 24+ hours waiting for the call that they hope never comes.

One is watching the dials, and the other one gets comfortable and relaxed so that they will be sharp when his turn comes to watch the dials.

Snuggies and fuzzy bunny slippers are a not infrequent part of the latter regime, hence the most awesome unit patch ever.

At the Laundromat

Our clothes dryer stopped heating last night, and today is laundry day.

So I am waiting for the skin cycle to end.

Dateline NBC is on the TVs here, which I find profoundly uninteresting.

Posted via mobile.

I Need This T-Shirt

This is the Old Fart Action Figure T-shirt.

I believe that this suits me very well.

I've been working on the whole, "Crotchety old fart," thing since I was about 12 years old.

The Stupid, It Just Never Ends

It appears that Donald Trump has decided not to make John Bolton Assistant Secretary of State.

It appears that he did not get the job because the Donald does not like facial, and the American Mustache Institute is pissed off:

The American Mustache Institute is bristling at President-elect Donald Trump’s reported prejudice against facial hair.

Addressing allegations that former United Nations ambassador John Bolton was passed over for secretary of state because of his mustache, the AMI staff banded together to defend one of their own and denounce the rumored act of discrimination. After referencing Trump’s long history of superficial statements — from his hosting of “The Apprentice” to his misogynistic comments about former pageant queen Alicia Machado — the AMI let things get hairy.

“The paradox, of course, is that Mr. Trump’s orange face and spaghetti squash mane would, theoretically through his own Clark Gable paradigm — who ironically had a mustache — would make Mr. Trump himself unfit to serve in a position of leadership,” the AMI staff wrote. “But beyond the esthetic and ongoing pattern of his embrace of an alt-right-like discrimination, the Mustached American community is deeply troubled by a new administration erecting yet another obstacle towards a level playing field for people of Mustached American heritage.”

The AMI added that “our quarrel is not political as we are a non-partisan institution of learning, thought and facial hair militancy.”

I honestly cannot tell the difference between reality and parody any more, but I think that this is real, only it sounds like a parody.

We live in Bizarro world.

Well Trolled

The Clinton Campaign is now offering tin foil hats with a rump theme:

Hillary Clinton's campaign is mocking Donald Trump with do-it-yourself tin foil hats.
Cinton's campaign website features a promotional brochure for a "Trump Tin Foil Hat." The brochure ridicules the Republican nominee for his "conspiracies" and shares instructions to help supporters create their own "Make America Great Again" foil hats.

"In fact if we elect Donald Trump, we could have a president dedicated to the truth: where is Elvis? Where did we film the moon landing?" the brochure reads.

Grab your tinfoil hat and buckle up—it doesn’t look like Donald Trump will stop peddling conspiracies any time soon. https://t.co/PrwQ5jXQPq pic.twitter.com/iAzZMPbf7I

— The Briefing (@TheBriefing2016) October 25, 2016

Whoever did this deserves a promotion.

That's Gotta Be Driving the Turks Crazy

Green Berets assisting the Kurds in Syria are wearing Kurdish militia insignia on their uniforms:

Photos have emerged of American special operations troops in Syria wearing uniform insignia affiliated with a Kurdish rebel group known as the YPG, whose connection to Turkish terrorists could could fuel tension between the U.S. and a key ally in the Islamic State fight.

The images were taken in a village about 40 miles north of the Islamic State group’s self-declared capital of Raqqa, which is the target of a newly announced offensive being led by a disparate group of Kurdish and Arab fighters, and backed by American military advisers and air support. They highlight the complicated network of alliances the U.S. is trying to forge in Syria, and the ethnic and sectarian tensions that could tear apart this fragile coalition.

Speaking Thursday, a top Pentagon official said it's fairly common for Green Berets and other operators to wear allies' patches.

This has got to be putting some kinks in Erdogan's mustache.

Tweet of the Day

Fist-bump, @Walmart , the term you're looking for is fist-bump. pic.twitter.com/JLqjyr2Apo

— Khalil Sehnaoui (@sehnaoui) April 12, 2016

H/t Mock Paper Scissors.

Haberdashery Advice Requested

It's been near the single digits in the morning and evening lately, and so the walk to and from the Metro station to work is less pleasant, so I need to cover my head.

I turned to the family expert on all things hat related, my daughter.

I sent her the following text:

Since you are the expert, I need advice.

It's getting cold, and I need a hat to keep warm.

Clearly it must also be silly, because ……… Dad.

Suggestions?

So, now I throw this out to the internet: Hat, must be warm and thoroughly silly.

Photographs appreciated.

Headline of the Day

Hong Kong Bra Protest after Woman Jailed for 'Breast Assault'

This is epic.

H/T Naked Capitalism.

I Want this T-Shirt!

This is too awesome for words.

Tech Headline of the Day

Nine reasons only a tool would buy the Apple Watch.

While Apple has had its share of failures, the Newton comes to mind, but the Apple Watch is the first time I've seen an Apple product reviled as lame pander to "Trustifarian" rich kids.

Since the original MacIntosh, Apple has always sold its products on its chic elegance and its tightly controlled (and intuitive) interface, but it has always had a subtext of Apple producing "The Computer for the rest of us."

This is not "The Computer for the rest of us".

What has attracted the most attention is the $17,000 (£13,500) solid gold version, and it casts the entire watch product line as a bloated Veblin good.^*

People like status objects, but they do not like to be made fools of, and this product screams, "More money than brains."

^*Named after economist Thorstein Veblin, who in his seminal work The Theory of the Leisure Class, coined the term "Conspicuous consumption", and detailed how some items, like a solid gold Apple Watch, serve no purpose beyond status markers.

Deep Thought

Yes, you can buy this.

H/t DC at the Stellar Parthenon BBS.

Deep Thought

Normally, My Commenting Fashion is Like My Commenting on Menstrual Cramps, But ………

I think that I can call this a major fashion fail:

Spanish clothing retailer Zara pulled a baby T-shirt from its web store Wednesday after social media users pointed out that its horizontal stripes and yellow star resembled a concentration camp prisoner's uniform.

An Israeli writer at 972 Magazine was the first to notice that the white-and-blue striped shirt, which featured a yellow star reading "SHERIFF" on one side, looked like the uniforms Jewish prisoners were forced to wear during the Holocaust.

Zara apologized to outraged Twitter users for the resemblance, explaining in several languages that the shirt was inspired by classic Western films and that it was no long available in stores.

Gee, you think that there might be some issues with that shirt?

Fuggedaboudit

This is the ultimate I Heart NY T-shirt.

I think that this is f%$#ing epic.

Your Moment of Science Fiction Awesome

Click on the images for a larger slideshow

Rather unsurprisingly, they both involve Star Trek, the original series.

The first is a photograph of an an enciente Orion slave girl courtesy of Wil Wheaton.

The bottom two pictures are of a remote that is modeled on the original props for the Star Trek phaser:

The Phaser was created from meticulous 3D scans of the last-known TOS hero prop and is a fully functional, gesture-based universal remote control that can be used to control many home entertainment systems and other IR-controlled devices. The 1:1-scale Phaser is equipped with 10 authentic phaser firing sounds, a customizable personal lock code, tactile force-feedback, and it can store up to 36 remote commands.

I'd never thought about it before, but that pistol grip is profoundly non ergonomic.

If you were to use the phaser, it would be hard to hit the broad side of a barn.

It's 150 bucks for the remote. The pregnant Orion slave girl: priceless.

I Love this Wifi ID Ever

LuLu's Anal Bleaching:

CITIZEN'S ARREST! A person who controls a wifi near the "combination hair salon and toy store on the increasingly stylish Fifth Avenue strip of Park Slope" called LuLu's has given his or her network a positively vulgar name. It is a name that threatens to sully the posh and sophisticated reputation of a shop that charges $26 to give your child a new lease on life via his or her tresses ($10 for just a bangs job). It is a name that is not good for kids.

On the Google Group bergenbtwn4and5, LuLu's owner Brigitte Prat (or someone posing as her using the handle brigittelpratt) shares the story of how her brand is being attacked (probably by a high person who thought it would be funny to satirize the presumed bourgieness of the children's salon): ………

That is f%$#ing brilliant!!!!

H/t DC at the Stellar Parthenon BBS.

Deep Thought

It's currently about 5° F (-15° C) outside.

I am considering wearing my winter coat.

Could My Relatives Please Confirm Who Sent Which T-Shirt?

OK, I know that Dad sent me this, because it came with gummy worms:


But who sent me this one?


Sometimes, Chanukah is confusing.

Why do High Fashion Models Look so Pissed Off?

OK, this one I get, if I had to wear that, I'd join a monastery in Tibet


She looks positively murderous






In the final analysis, who pissed in their Cheerios?

OK, so I am looking up a Guardian essay, and there's a link to a London fashion show, and I pop it open in a new tab, because the picture above the link shows a very skinny woman looking unbelievably miserable, and because, well, the internet.

I peruse the pictures, and they all look like their favorite grandfather just died.

Is there some sort of rule that fashion models have to be miserable?

Because, to me, at least, miserable women are not attractive, and neither are their clothes.  (To be fair, there is some sh%$ on the runway that the Goddess Aphrodite could not save).